Fear

Fear; the driving force to almost every action a person takes. Fear of what might happen if you don’t, of what might happen if you do; all of which can be boiled down to fear of the unknown. That was my driving force now. Fear of the ‘What if’; what if I left and never looked back, what if I looked and he didn’t reciprocate? A fear of not knowing can drive a man to do a myriad of things while leaving him stunned and left in his tracks by all the things he didn’t do. So now that I was standing on the precipice of my life; watching over the edge at the ferocious waters below what was I left to do but to dive, dive and hope that it doesn’t kill me. His fingers brushed my skin; setting a flame that’s heat warred with any fire set by a match. His lips caught mine in a heated embrace; one that left my lips numb and my breath gasping for more. It was like every bone was being electrocuted at once as each hair stood on end. He slipped inside me; filling me to the brim. He pushed against smooth and moistened walls; stretching them to their limits. He spoke; his words like a song bird that hummed for only me. I love you hung on his lips like the last drop of water; the one single globule that would be left to quench a thirst that’s been killing you inside for far too long. For what's in a word; you've been told your whole life that words meant nothing; actions were what spoke volumes and his actions roared like a pride of lions. I love you; like a thunderclap in the midst of the night. The words you needed to hear; your saving grace and yet he never spoke them. He left your thirst unquenched; your driving force coming to a screeching halt as if you'd be hit by a semi-truck and what were you left with now? A gaping hole of nothingness; an endless abyss of pain and suffering with no light and nothing to pull you to safety and so you're left to tumble into the darkness and die; Alone, rotting and torn; between the unknown and what if.

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